As I struggle to put this blog together myself, I am realizing that this may have been exactly what I needed. All this time, I have been jotting down my every day into a ten-year-old laptop with an outdated Microsoft Office program, and everyone who has a shitty computer knows that's exactly what you don't want. Especially since I rely on that computer to keep up my memory. See, I was born with this, I shouldn't call it an ability because it's really just a curse, but I can't remember a thing most of the time. I should just say I have a "tendency" to forget everything and, well, all things. It's so bad that when I put something down, it's very hard for me to remember why I had it in the first place or what I was going to do with it. I walk out of a room for something, and the hallway that leads me into the other room becomes a threshold of attempting to remember why I was even entering the other room at all. Of course, it will probably get me into trouble someday and I don't want to be held back because of such an awful and seemingly average humanly flaw, so that's why I write. It helps me remember. It helps me be who I need to be in order to fulfill anything and everything I have ever dreamed of. I am bringing you along for the ride, not because I feel that my words might be worth reading, but because you might feel that my words are worth reading, and in which case, I will be here to deliver.
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There are days on this planet when I wake up in the morning and I can't remember why I was happy yesterday. It's like all your memories vanish in one instance and you can't remember being happy. And as that flash of memory disappears and sadness sets in, you start to wonder if you even know what real happiness is. I am creating this blog so that I can learn to understand myself as well as learn to understand others. I am hoping that creating this will free my mind, even if only for a little while, so I can distinguish between what is real and what is wrong, what is beauty and what is deformed, what is strong and what is cowardly, and what is powerful and what is comfortable. This is my comfort zone. This is my rational and irrational thinking. This is my book. My life. My freedom. This is factoring emotions.
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Wisdom
All we have are words, hot coffee, and a keyboard; and it's all we really need. Archives
June 2023
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