Well, it's certainly a slow process. Slow going as I imagined it would be. I'm not back to talking to myself yet, that's how you know I've really accepted my life for what it is. Not yet- I'm still stuck in my head and stuck in my heart. I've been working to try and freeze it over, numb it back out to where it was. And then sometimes I cry. It hits me randomly; while I'm making a cup of tea, vacuuming the living room, or making notes for work - regular, every day things that make me feel like I'm pushing forward when, really, I'm standing still. Time keeps flowing, and I'm standing completely still on this trail of events, some have happened to me, some just happen around me - and I try to feel something outside of myself. It's always easier to focus on everyone else's problems then it is to focus on your own. So that's what I'll do. For now. And soon I'll be far away, and I get to enjoy my days in the sun with nothing else on my mind but sunshine and morning mimosas, and beautiful evenings enjoying this fantastic view.
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